I believe I would have been a more confident and capable leader if I had someone to hold my hand, or had spaces to connect with other women in leadership roles who faced similar challenges....

I became the Director of a nonprofit organisation at a relatively young age. Unfortunately, that was during a challenging period where many funding partners who had supported South Africa were leaving the country to focus on regional programs. It was a critical moment with serious implications for many organisations and people in South Africa. 

While my passion and drive and for justice made me excited about leading my new organisation, I did not fully grasp what lay ahead. One of my biggest shocks came during our first team meeting. When I applied for the job I was led to believe we had ample funds, but in reality, resources were running low. The reality of our situation hit us quickly. If we were to fulfil our mandate and ensure the organisation’s sustainability, we would have to work tirelessly. And to be honest, we were not fully prepared for the challenge.

I needed someone to help me understand that much of the scrutiny I faced was not about me, but about systemic and gendered challenges that made it harder for women leaders like me to thrive.

As a young female Director of the organisation, I carried multiple burdens—fundraising in a challenging environment, managing donor reports, overseeing staff, and keeping stakeholders informed. At home, I also bore the gendered responsibilities of being a mother and a wife. Did I handle all these responsibilities well? I did my best. But in hindsight it’s clear that things could have been better.

I believe I would have been a more confident and capable leader if I had someone to hold my hand, or had spaces to connect with other women in leadership roles who faced similar challenges. I needed someone to help me understand that much of the scrutiny I faced was not about me, but about systemic and gendered challenges that made it harder for women leaders like me to thrive. Not only would this have had a positive impact on my team and our organisation’s work, I would have been able to go home and sleep better at night.

How can women leaders rise above systemic and gendered obstacles and still thrive?

I know many women leaders face similar challenges. Women, more so than men, are expected to manage multiple responsibilities both inside and outside the workplace. In addition,  ageism, systemic gender biases, societal expectations, and toxic organisational cultures frequently undermine their authority, confidence, and voice.

One thing that helped me during this time was having a mentor with whom I met occasionally. The many hours I spent with him helped me navigate a very challenging, exciting and growth-oriented period in my life. He listened without judgment and generously shared his experiences. I learned best practices from an organisation he led, some of which I adapted for my own organisation. However, the support from an older, white male leader from a vastly different background was simply not enough for me. I needed more.

Now, as a certified coach, I realise that coaching, along with intentional leadership training, could have better prepared me for that role.

When I began my job as Director I found myself struggling in many areas of leadership. Like many nonprofits, my organisation had not been intentional in preparing for leadership succession. As a result, I was unsure about the future and about my new leadership roles and capacities in the organisation. Looking back in those years, I often feel sorry for the colleagues I led during those tumultuous times.

Now, as a certified coach, I realise that coaching, along with intentional leadership training, could have better prepared me for that role.

I have since founded and co-direct an organisation called Womaniko Transforming Spaces. Primarily our work seeks to contribute to social and systemic change so that all women can thrive in and out of work. We provide tailored services to foster gender-transformative impact, supporting organisations that aim to contribute to gender equality and address gender-based violence and harassment internally, whilst contributing to change in society at large. We engage women through generative conversations that move us from challenges to ideas for change; offer coaching programs for women, using a combination of approaches - Positive Intelligence, Systems Thinking, and Gender Transformative Change. Lastly, we conduct monitoring and evaluations using a feminist lens.

• For more information about Womaniko see the bio below.

Photo by Ninthgrid on Unsplash